“Believe what is in the line of your needs, for only by such belief is the need fulfilled… Have faith that you can successfully make it, and your feet are nerved to its accomplishment”.
William James, Principles of Psychology
Everyone around us wants to be identified as a confident person. Nowadays, confidence is deemed to be necessary because of its association with high performance, greater motivation, interpersonal success, happiness and better quality of life.
There are many schools of thought around the actual definition of self-confidence. Self-esteem, self-efficacy, self –confidence are all related concepts. Literature shows self confidence involves believing in one’s own abilities. It refers to how capable one thinks of himself or herself to deal effectively with various situations. It is also defined as a feeling of well-being and greater acceptance of one’s mind and body. It could be generalized or task specific.
Task specific confidence entails believing in one’s ability to undertake a specific task to achieve an outcome. For example, having the belief that one can easily attain information related to sales decision would be described as information gathering self-confidence. This type of self-confidence is influenced by past experiences, and it gets updated after each new experience. Therefore, it is dynamic over time.
Sometimes self-confidence is described as a personality trait, and we call it generalized self-confidence. It is the extent to which an individual believes himself to be capable, significant, successful, and worthy in general.
Thus, self confidence can be defined both as a trait and a belief in one’s own abilities. We need a healthy amount of self-confidence to face everyday difficulties and participate in things we find enjoyable and rewarding.
Research has shown that low confidence is not helpful: it inhibits performance by inducing worry, sadness, stress, and fear, which may drive people to give up sooner or later. It initiates a cycle of negative thinking which might make one feel one is not capable enough.
What can low confidence feel like?
- Anxiety
- Communication difficulties
- Expecting worst outcomes for oneself
- Avoiding challenges or situations due to the fear of failing
- Difficulty in making decisions
- Feelings of insignificance
- Hypersensitivity to criticism
TIPS TO BOOST SELF CONFIDENCE
The whole idea of building self-confidence involves self-assurance, moving beyond one’s insecurities, believing that one is capable and hoping that people feel assured about one’s capabilities. Below are simple strategies that can help anyone boost their confidence instantly.
- Physical Activities – Take a walk. Run. Go to the gym. Do pilates. Research has shown that changes in physical activity and associated physical parameters (e.g., fitness, weight) brought about by exercise interventions have indirect effects on global self-confidence.
- Take a note of your strengths – We often lose confidence because of our negative biases. Focusing on our weakness and believing that we haven’t achieved anything, over a period of time, is going to make us feel low in confidence. Make a list of all the small and big things you’re proud of in your life, whether it’s getting praised for cooking a delicious meal or a promotion at work. Keep the list close by and add to it whenever you do something you’re proud of. Whenever your inner critic tries to get hold of you, pull out the list and use it to remind yourself of all the amazing stuff you’ve done.
- Empower yourself through practice and gaining knowledge – Empowering yourself is one of the best strategies for building self-confidence. If you want to be confident about any task, practice it as much as you can. This is same as building competence and getting prepared by becoming more skilled, thus you’ll be more confident. Another way to empower yourself is through knowledge. Read. Get yourself enrolled in new courses.
- Talk to yourself – Engage in positive self talk. It could be silent or verbalized. It is talking to oneself by describing feelings one has about himself, for example, I am Ok., I can do this., I am going good. This therapeutic self talk is an active intervention to boost confidence instantly. Further, people with low confidence often have communication difficulties. Start making small conversations with people around you. Before you expose yourself to the larger public, initiate by making short talks on daily basis with people around you.
- Set Small targets for yourself – Once you start achieving smaller targets, your confidence will be better and you will start looking for bigger goals.
- Enroll yourself in a therapy – There are many factors that contribute to low self-confidence such as genes, cultural background, childhood experiences, and other life circumstances. It affects our thinking process and how we see ourselves and feel about our abilities. We can’t change our past experiences that shaped us. However, therapy can help us alter our thoughts and help us gain new confidence.
While pursuing self-confidence, just remind yourself to introspect constantly and remain grounded to reality. It will help strike a balance and a sound reality check. We must understand that self confidence is a dynamic concept with its highs and lows. However, when it is low over a long period of time, it can hamper our life and that is when we need to work on it. Lastly, if things don’t work out at your own level, please don’t hesitate to seek professional help.
Wishing you the best of mental health today and always!
Huda Naaz